Things That Go Bump Into The Night
by Awesome Anonymous
Summary: Naruto hates things that go bump into the night. Especially when it's Hinata and Sasuke because they bump every night. //SasuHina\\-//Short and Simple\\


So this is a little concoction I made up on Monday night and I'm submitting it now because I just feel like it :) So listen up and listen good: I'M. BACK. TO. WRITING. MISERY. Get it, got it, good. I realized I like that story more than I know...also because I know what's going to happen even more than I did, if that makes sense -.-

Anyway, I have finals from now until Tuesday. Joy :( But I'll be able to write (maybe) because I only need to worry about one more.

Pair(s) — SasuHina & a wee of NaruHina

Words — 847 or so ;D

Rating — M — Reason: Big reference towards sex p.p

Enjoy n.n

* * *

I'm, usually, a very optimistic person. You know, hyper and everything. Happy, good ol' Naruto! Yep!

But I seriously have a pet peeve that's been irking me for about a few months now.

See, I hate, I mean **HATE** things that go bump into the night. I'm not a prude or anything, but it'd really annoying. And I especially despise it when it's Sasuke and Hinata. Because they bump every night if you know what I mean.

I definitely do.

Right now, I'm lying in my bed and I can already hear the giggles and I know where it's heading. I sigh. They've started when she came over four hours ago: the tickling, the giggling, the whispering, and of course I can't forget the groping when they thought I wasn't looking.

But it was so obvious.

It got quiet. Real quiet. So quiet I can hear myself breath in and out. So quiet I can hear a pin drop. So quiet I can hear her in his room—which is RIGHT next to mind I might add—whispering, "Sasuke, no." Then there's silence, but I know she's looking at the wall like I'm there. Probably with a worried look on her face. She says, "Naruto might hear—"

"No he won't." Sasuke cuts her off and I can just see the smirk on his face now.

YES! I! CAN!

Now there's no talking or giggling. No nothing. That means some foreplay is taking place. And I don't know if I can take this anymore. I really think I'm going to explode from…something! I'm tired of Sasuke making so much noise! Every night! Even on Sunday nights! Work has to be done, but he doesn't give a damn! He never does! Jackass!

I stare up at the ceiling with wide eyes and grip my covers tighter each time I hear the bed move, and it's going like five miles a minute! They always have that hardcore sex! Like HARD, **HARD**core sex! I feel it against the wall! It's horrible!

bang.

Bang.

BANG!

**BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!!**

And she's so noisy! And she's always is! You would think since she so shy she wouldn't be so loud but damn! Loud moans! They bounce right off the walls! Pst, I use to not mind, if you get where I'm heading. But I stopped. You know why? Because it sucks to know—hear your best friend getting some and you ain't getting jack!

Fuck! Damn! Moans! Groans! All this leaves HIS mouth! He's loud too! Can you believe it! The evil Sasuke Uchiha is loud in bed! Wow, that should make the front page!

"Oh! Hinata you're so tight!"

Ugh, now the dirty words. And I don't know what the hell he's talking about! They do it every night, how is she still…forget it. Wow, and this is when he's practically screaming at the top of his lungs and their _night_ is almost over.

"SASUKE!!"

Well she's done, and he will be in three, two, one…

"FUCK!!"

Applause. Bravo. The _hearing_ is over. It's almost like those silent movies, except you can hear and not see. Anyway, the moving has stopped, and I can hear the smooch or two, and the hushed I love yous.

So the bumps are gone. The moving has stopped. I look at the clock and sigh; I have to wake up in about two hours.

**-**

I pour myself a cup of coffee and sigh out of frustration when Sasuke comes into the kitchen smirking like crazy. I loured. "Have a great **night**?" I hiss.

He looks at me with a raised eyebrow, eating an apple. "What's with you?"

I hear the front door open and close. I roll my eyes and turn around then start cutting my breakfast sandwich in half. "Nothing."

"Naruto." he calls.

"Hm?"

"You look pale. Maybe you should get more sleep and stop watching so much TV."

My blood starts to boil. Mouthfucker!! I slam the knife in my hand on the counter and turn around quickly.

He gives me a weird look. "What's with—"

"Don't give me that shit!"

He glares.

I roll my eyes and say, "Ooooh! I'm so scared!" His glare leaves and he looks sort of surprised now. Aha! That's what you get bitch! "Sasuke, do you know what sucks about being your roommate?"

He just stares.

"Hearing you and Hinata fuck over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again!" I yell. "I just can't take it! I mean, you guys are like BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM—"

"Fine." he cuts me off, irritated as hell.

My anger leaves and I'm surprised. "What?"

"We won't be so loud." he says and goes to the frig as he whispers, "As long as you calm the fuck down."

I beam! Hell yeah! No more black rings around my eyes. Bye bye!

That night…

"SASUKE!! I'M COMING!!"

I put my pillow over my head and scream. My life sucks.

* * *

First person and straight from the fox's mouth. Dandy! I think Naruto needs to find a different place to live, I would.

Did you like it? You should've. I liked it, kind of. If you did, don't tell me. Really. 'Cause I'm pretty sure I wouldn't care !D But as always, that _slightly_ keen criticize is welcome.

Favorite Part: BAM! x? ;P


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